An update on self-confidence

Self-confidence is a topic frequently addressed in many articles, but simply saying “be confident” is unlikely to help you achieve true self-esteem. It’s important to work on your self-confidence, and we’ll give you a few pointers on how to do just that.

First of all, it’s important to know what defines you as an individual. What area of your life is most important to you and in which you feel most competent? Is it your work, your friendships, or your passion for tarot? It could be something small, but of great importance to you, and something in which you excel. Use this as a starting point for regaining a positive self-image.

We all have above-average skills and qualities in certain areas, but we often forget these inner treasures when we feel inferior in other areas.

So it’s not a question of becoming like so-and-so, but of developing your own abilities to the maximum. Because by transforming yourself to be someone else, even if you have a surge of self-confidence at the start, very quickly you’ll only sink deeper into devaluation, aware that you’re not receiving success for who you are but for who you make believe you are.

Do you really want to be appreciated for being a lie in front of people? No.

The second point is one of the most essential. Maintain benevolence. If you think that being the king of assholes gives you fantastic power over people, and therefore great self-confidence, you’re not going very far in your reasoning. Everyone has the power to hurt or be execrable to others. In a world where violence is an almost daily occurrence, it’s easy to react and blame others for the violence. On the other hand, it’s a real challenge to be kind to your interlocutors, which gives you a power that not everyone has. It’s a sign that you’re detached from the gaze of others, that you know your own worth, and that you don’t let the venom you receive get to you.

Also, if you’re positive and kind to others, you’ll find that you’ll attract the same kind of people, so you’ll receive positive feedback, which will give you a good self-image. The circle of violence is well known. Well, so is the circle of gentleness.

The final point to work on is risk-taking. Often, a lack of self-confidence is an inhibiting factor, and it can be difficult to get started. However, when you start to take risks and invest actively in your life, you’ll be drained by a very positive energy, because you’ll realize that you’re capable. Feeling capable is one of the richest sources of self-confidence. Whatever the failures in these undertakings, know that no great man you admire has received immediate success in what he has undertaken. Failure is a very important part of the business, but what distinguishes the person with great vitality from the amorphous one is that, despite the pain of failure, they don’t stop.

So here are a few tips to help you start building your self-confidence, so you can feel empowered and shine in the eyes of women (and yourself!).