It’s time to break the stereotype of the alpha male, that virile, dominant figure who is considered the masculine ideal. This concept has long been associated with the strong, confident, competitive, aggressive and dominant man. But the reality is that this stereotype is toxic and damaging to men’s mental health.
The alpha male pushes men to be constantly competitive, to measure themselves against each other, not to show their emotions, to be aggressive and to dominate others. This can lead to problems such as depression, anxiety, violence, alcoholism and drug addiction.
Instead, we need to encourage men to be themselves, to express their emotions, to ask for help when they need it, and to be sensitive and caring. We need to recognize that every man is different and that masculinity should not be defined by stereotypical traits.
It’s time to break down the barriers that prevent men from being authentic and vulnerable. We need to create an environment where men feel safe to express their vulnerability and fragility. Ultimately, we all need to work together to promote positive, healthy masculinity.
Seduction sites are full of articles on the myth of the “alpha male”, presented as the man who could conquer any woman with a simple glance. However, contrary to what the authors of these articles – usually men – believe, being in the presence of a hyper-testosterone individual who plays hard to get while always seeming busy is neither exciting nor attractive. Wanting to be with a charismatic man doesn’t necessarily mean wanting to be with a Viking with a thirst for blood and food. So it’s important to get rid of stereotypes about “alpha males”. Here’s a list of clichés to forget.
- A man for whom all women are the sameWe regularly read that the alpha male is never impressed by a woman, because for him, who knows women better than anyone else, they all taste and smell the same.
FalseIt’s important to remember that anyone you’re flirting with is going to want to be a bit special in your eyes, otherwise what’s the point? Feeling like you’re drowning in a mountain of other chicks isn’t really exciting, so on the contrary, don’t hesitate to show the girl you’re interested in that she’s different in your eyes.
- A constantly busy manNot making himself too available, looking busy, leaving prematurely.
False: all these techniques, if you’re not really busy already, are very burnt out and will make you a pathetic person inventing a life for yourself. It’s really not glamorous.
Then, even if you don’t have to make yourself available every second of your life, because while it’s obviously better to be with someone who’s fulfilled and has a life outside ourselves, that doesn’t mean we like to feel like we’re taking second place to everything else. It’s very cool to see that someone we like has time for us, isn’t constantly in a hurry or on the phone dealing with 60 files and 25 phone calls a minute. We like men who are available and more interested in chatting with us than in keeping up with their busy outside lives.
- ConfidentTo be self-confident and at ease in any situation or context.
True and falseSelf-confidence: it’s true that self-confidence is a plus, and it’s very important and attractive. But being cocky, pretentious or overconfident can also be off-putting to many women. It’s all about balance. Feeling good about yourself doesn’t mean feeling above everything and everyone else. So take it easy and don’t confuse self-importance with self-confidence.
- He’s not shyHe’s a man who puts himself forward and constantly reaches out to others.
True and falseIt all depends on the type of woman you’re dealing with. Some women absolutely fall for reserved, slightly shy men. They may find this adorable and very charming if it doesn’t turn into a total phobia of contact with others. So before being an “alpha male”, be yourself and attract the kind of person who will love you just as you are.
- He takes great care with his lookThe alpha male is not a sloppy man. He knows for a fact that women fall for men who are flirtatious and well-groomed.
FalseOnce again, what kind of unbearable cliché is this? It depends on the woman! Some might even be exasperated by a man who spends all his time navel-gazing and obsessing about his image. But being the kind of person who pays attention to every detail can be repulsive and unpleasant. A little spontaneity.