Lack of representation is one of the main reasons for the silence surrounding cunnilingus. For a long time, the penis was easily represented, while the clitoris was more difficult to illustrate. This lack of understanding of the source of female pleasure made it a mysterious and therefore frightening object. Men were therefore more reluctant to practice cunnilingus, as they didn’t know how to go about it.
What’s more, for a very long time, female pleasure was completely ignored. Heterosexual sexual relations were centered on penile penetration and nothing else. Fulfilling practices around sexual intercourse were ignored, making sex a mere means of fertilization for women and a source of pleasure for men. This left little room for the discovery and exploration of alternative sexual practices.
However, things have evolved and more and more men are practicing female masturbation, oral sex, and all the sexual practices that can give women a great deal of pleasure. It’s important to break sexual taboos and communicate freely and without judgment with your partner about your preferences to maximize moments of pleasure.
Why all this silence about cunnilingus?
First of all, representation. For a long time, the penis was very easily represented, while the clitoris was much more difficult to illustrate. The lack of knowledge about the source of female pleasure made it a mysterious and therefore frightening object. Men were therefore more reluctant to practice it, as they didn’t know how to go about it.
Then, for a very long time, female pleasure was completely ignored. A heterosexual sexual relationship was centered on penetration by the penis, and that was that. The other aspects of a fulfilling sexual relationship were completely ignored, making sex a simple means of fertilization for women, and a source of pleasure for men. In fact, even if things have changed a lot on this issue, the fact remains that to this day, for many men, female sexual pleasure can only be achieved, or mainly, with their penis. On the other hand, female homosexual relations teach us a diversity of practices that give women great pleasure.
Fortunately, things are changing. More and more men are practising female masturbation, oral sex and all the other things that can give women a lot of pleasure, making sexual penetration just another stage in the cuddly moment.
Let’s get down to business: how to perform cunnilingus?
Big question. Indeed, given the lack of knowledge about the practice, some men may not dare approach the crucial area for fear of not knowing how to handle it. And yet, just like fellatio or any other sexual practice, it’s all about adapting to your partner, because a successful cunnilingus for one may be less satisfying for another. Just as some men like one kind of blowjob and others not. So you have to start by demystifying the practice and going by instinct, by feeling.
Like all other sexual practices, the most important thing for shared satisfaction is to communicate your preferences freely and without judgment with your partner. Each person finds pleasure differently, and it’s simply a matter of getting to know each other physically as individuals to maximize the moments of pleasure.
Even if sexual taboos are still present in communication, the more you can talk about them and play down the issues, the more your sexuality will flourish.